


💺✨😎

by katychan666



Series: Texting Series [13]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Crack, Drunk Alec Lightwood, Humor, M/M, Texting, emojis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-16 15:24:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18096992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katychan666/pseuds/katychan666
Summary: Drunk Alec has a plan! He is a man with a plan, with a mission that will renovate the chair industry! With the help of Magnus and others ofc 👀😏✨





	💺✨😎

“Theo!” whined Alec as he was gulping down his sixth glass of whiskey and then pressed his lips together as he was looking around the Hunter's Moon, hiccuping as he was on a  _ quest  _ to find his precious boyfriend, but he was nowhere to be seen and Alec was panicking. Where did his precious warlock go? Who took him? Alec's heart fell to the pit of his stomach and he was trying to calm himself. Underhill was being a responsible adult  _ again _ , allowing his boss to get hammered while he limited himself to a couple of drinks tops. He wasn't much a drinker anyway and was now holding back his laughter when he looked at Alec, who was squinting, one hand above his forehead as he was scanning the room. Underhill started laughing.

 

“Did you lose something?” asked Underhill and crossed his arms on top of his chest. Alec looked at Underhill and nodded. Yes? Whatever could Alec be looking for at this moment?! “Well, what is it?” he then asked and Alec looked at him, sheer desperation in his eyes, Underhill narrowing his eyes as he wasn’t getting the picture at all.

 

“I lost Magnus,” announced Alec and Underhill narrowed his eyes. Theodore wanted to laugh, but then he saw real tears in Alec’s eyes and he rolled his eyes. So, he was serious. How did he even come up with that?! It wasn’t like Magnus came with them to the Hunter’s Moon. The warlock was busy with other stuff and that was why Alec and Underhill went alone, after work to grab a few drinks.

 

“Um, okay?” asked Underhill and rubbed the back of his neck. Man, Alec was really drunk, wasn’t he? Kind of hilarious and Underhill pressed his lips together, while Alec was staring at his now empty glass in disappointment. 

 

“Theo, someone stole my drink,” said Alec and then looked at his friend, completely horrified and betrayed. “Was it you?!” shrieked Alec and then looked at the poor empty glass, completely forgetting that it was him who gulped everything down that was in there. Underhill started laughing and Alec was scowling at him then.

 

“I didn’t-”

 

“Why are you  _ laughing? _ ” asked Alec. “I lost my boyfriend and my drink,” grumbled Alec, but then got serious again when he remembered his boyfriend and he went back to searching for him in the room, but he was nowhere! Magnus, oh, Magnus, where did you go?! How do you dare to leave poor Alec all on his own?! Alec wouldn’t be able to… Underhill was laughing  _ again!! _

 

“It was you who drank that whiskey, boss,” said Underhill and crossed his arms on top of his chest and Alec perked up, then started thinking about it. Oh, right! Maybe it was him! His memory was kind of fuzzy, so… “As for Magnus, you know he got held up and couldn’t come with us. He had some stuff to handle with the warlocks and-”

 

“So  _ work _ stole my boyfriend?!” snapped Alec and pulled out his Seraph blade. “Tell me where work took my warlock? I’ll slaughter them all. They will see the wrath of Alexander Gideon Lightwood, they will… Theo, why is the room spinning so much?” asked Alec as he suddenly stood up while he was making his declaration and Underhill quickly pulled him down, forcing Alec to sit still on the chair and he was pouting. 

 

“Sit.”

 

“You’re not the boss of me,” said Alec and stuck out his tongue. “ _ I  _ am your boss, so if I want to stand-”

 

“Well, be my guest. Don’t come crying to me if you fall on your ass,” said Underhill, teasing Alec back, who was then rolling his eyes.

 

“ _ Don’t come crying to me if you fall on your ass, _ ” was repeating Alec in an octave higher. “Who made you my mom?” asked Alec and then his jaw dropped. “Oh my God, was that just super bitchy of me?!” asked Alec and before Underhill could reply, Alec was hugging him. “I am so sorry, don’t leave me. My only friend, my-”

 

“For the love of...” said Underhill and managed to free himself from Alec’s grip. “Just sit still for five minutes,” he said and then took in a deep breath. While he was trying not to laugh again, Alec was falling deeper and deeper into his despair. He needed to contact Magnus immediately! He needed to tell his boyfriend everything about him losing him and then Theo being a traitor! Magnus needed to know. That was why Alec grabbed his phone and decided to text Magnus, though the letters on the keyboard looked rather funny. Yet, he still texted instead of calling, because he wanted to prove it to himself and to the world, that he could still type even though he was drunk. After all, he was pretty amazing!

 

**Alec: 😭😭😭😭**

**Alec: 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱**

**Alec:** _ Magnuuuus!!!!!!! Where are youuu???? _

**Alec:** _ Pls reply to me! Is work holding u hostage??? _

**Alec:** _ Baby, come back to me! Cuz I need u here with meeee _

**Alec: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

**Alec:** _ Theo is being mean. He’s laughing at me. When I lost you he laughed at me. Now he is still laughing. Y is he like dis? I am amazing and am his boss and he still laughing. He’s a traitor. Magnus tel him to stop! _

 

As Alec was writing there were many spelling  and grammar mistakes, but he was far too drunk to be paying attention to that. Underhill gave him an offended look when he read what he wrote about him and gently smacked his shoulder. “Who are you calling a traitor?” he asked and pouted. 

 

“You’re the traitor, you hit me!”

 

**Alec:** _ Magnus, he called me a traitor  _

**Alec:** _ Theo hates me _

**Alec: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

 

Magnus wasn’t replying back at all! Oh no, who got him??

 

“I don’t hate you,” said Underhill and rolled his eyes.

 

“You hit me,” said Alec and pointed to his shoulder. “Ouuuch, it huuurts, you meanie,” he said, lying, then he giggled and swayed back  in his chair. Since it was the stool, he almost ended up falling on the floor. If it wasn’t for Underhill’s hand, he would ended up on the floor and he grumbled. “What kind of an asshole designed this? I mean really? A chair which doesn’t have the back?! I suppose this is one of those modern art stuff,” he said, putting the last things in air quotes and he grumbled. “Must be a Mundane invention.”

 

Underhill was just sitting there and laughing. He didn’t get to see drunk Alec much. “It is pretty unpractical,” admitted Underhill.

 

“Right?!” said Alec and then a  _ brilliant  _ idea popped into his mind. “Underhill! We need to open our line of chairs, design something better than this,” said Alec and his eyes glowed as he looked at the chair he was sitting on in disgust.. “I’ll be the CEO, you’ll be in charge of promotion!” rambled Alec and Theodore raised an eyebrow. “Picture this if you will…  _ Underwood, where all of your chair fantasies come true, _ ” said Alec, proud of the brand name and slogan he had going on. 

 

Underhill was dying with laughter.. “Oh yeah?” asked Underhill and started cracking up when he saw the serious expression on Alec’s face. “It’ll be just the two of us? I think you need to expand our team if you want it to be a success,” said Theo, playing along and Alec and banged his fists against the bar.

 

“You’re a genius,” said Alec and texted Magnus again, even though he didn’t reply yet- 

 

**Alec:** _ Magnus, Theo and I are starting a new business! _

**Alec:** _ One word: chairs _

**Magnus:** _???? _

**Magnus:** _ Are you feeling okay??? Alexander? _

**Alec: 💺✨😎**

**Magnus:** _ Are you drunk? _

**Alec:** _ But of course 🍺 🍷 _ 🍻

**Magnus: 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂**

**Magnus:** _ I knew it. You’re adorable when you’re drunk! _

**Magnus:** _ So, what is this chair business you’re starting?  _ 👀👀👀👀👀

**Alec:** _ I’m glad you asked! Let me picture this to you.  _

**Alec:** _ Underwood, where all of your chair fantasies come true! No more uncomfortable chairs, with us you only get the best. We care about YOU, your comfort level is our priority!  _ 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗😻😏😏😏😏

**Magnus: 😂😂😂😂😂😂**

**Magnus:** _ Underwood?  _ **😂😂😂**

**Alec:** _ Underhill + Lightwood  _ **✨✨✨**

**Magnus:** _ Oooh! Well, you do have a genius brand name and the slogan seems quite catchy. Chair fantasies, huh?  _ 😏😏😏😏😏

**Alec:** 😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏

**Alec:** _ Oh, yes   _ **😎😎😎**

**Alec:** _ So, I’m the CEO and Theo is in charge of the promotion! But, I need your help as well! _

**Magnus: 😂😂**

 

Alec was cracking up as he was going along; he knew it was being silly despite all the alcohol in his system, but the game was afoot and Underhill kept reading the texts between him and Magnus. After all, he was on the promotion team, so he needed to know what was up. 

 

**Magnus:** _ So, what would be my part? _

**Alec:** _ Well, you’d be there to test if all the chair fantasies do come true  _ 😏😏😏

**Magnus:** 👀👀👀👀👀

**Alec:** _ Interested?  _ **😎😎😎**

**Magnus:** _ Yes, always glad to help your fantasies come true, Alexander  _ 😏😏

**Alec:** _ You know, for science. Much research will be needed. Long hours of deep and much detailed work. But I’m willing to sacrifice myself  _ 😏😏😏😏😏

**Magnus: 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤**

**Alec:** _ We’ll have to rename the brand to HardWood then  _ **🤤🤤🤤🤤**

**Magnus: 😂😂😂😂😂😂**

**Alec:** _ Who will be in charge of design??? _

**Magnus:** _ Biscuit!! _

**Alec:** _ Right! I’ll go ask her! _

 

“Okay, now there’s already three of us on the team,” said Alec and Underhill was cracking up. “Need to ask Clary! Wait, I’ll add her into our group chat.”

 

**Alec:** _ Fray! I have a job for you! _

**Clary:** _???? _

**Alec:** _ Underhill and I are starting our chair business line ,we need you to help us out with design. Can I count on you? _

**Clary:** _???????????? _

**Clary:** _ Is something wrong with you? _

**Underhill:** _ He’s drunk  _ **😂😂😂😂**

**Clary:** _ Oh, okay, that explains so much  _ **😂😂😂**

 

Alec frowned. 

 

**Alec:** _ Is this funny to you? _

**Clary:** _ Um… yes? _

**Alec: 😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒**

**Alec: 👿👿👿👿👿👿👿👿👿👿**

**Alec: 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱**

**Alec: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

 

Alec then added Magnus into the group chat as well.

 

**Alec:** _ Magnus, Biscuit is laughing at me. She won’t help our chair business to take off  _ **😭😭😭😭**

**Clary:** _ I didn't say that!! _

**Alec:** _ But you laughed at me  _ **😭😭😭😭**

**Magnus:** _ Oh my poor baby. Clarissa, you better apologise to my Angel. _

**Clary:** _ Right, right. I’m sorry. Happy? _

**Alec: 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗**

**Clary:** _ So how do I help this business? _

**Alec:** _ Theo, if you will present our idea to her. _

**Underhill:** _Me?!_ **😱😱😱😱**

**Alec:** _ Well, you’re the promotion team. _

**Underhill:** _ Right!  _ **😂😂😂😂😂**

**Underhill:** _ So the plan is! Um. Well! Our Brand’s name is Underwood, where all of you chair fantasies will come true. We will have many chairs!  _

**Alec:** _ That was weak… _

**Underhill: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

**Underhill:** _ I try again! Okay. So! Our chairs will accommodate to all of your needs. No more uncomfortable chairs, ours will be innovative! Only the sky's our limit! _

**Alec:** _ Better! _

**Underhill: 🤗🤗🤗🤗**

**Clary: 😂😂😂😂**

**Clary:** _ And I’ll be…? _

**Alec:** _ You’re the design team, duh!!! _

**Clary:** _ Oh! Hmm… interesting! _

**Magnus:** _ Alexander and I are CEOs  _ **😂**

**Underhill:** _ Wait, I thought it was only Alec the boss? _

**Alec:** _ Well, we’re married practically.  So it makes sense. Half of what is mine is his. So half of company will be his and he’ll be CEO too. All is settled. We need a secretary! _

**Clary:** _ Jace? _

**Alec:** _ Yesssss _

 

Alec added Jace into the chat and told him all about his plan.

 

**Alec:** _ Congrats on your promotion, bro!  _

**Jace:** _ It’ll be my pleasure to work for your chair company, Underhill and Lightwood! _

**Alec:** _ Hmm… maybe we should give Izzy a spot too? _

**Magnus:** _ Isabelle could be a part of design team as well, with Biscuit _

**Clary:** _ Omg, yes! _

 

So, Alec added Isabelle into the chat as well.

 

**Alec:** _ Congrats sis, you’re on our design team as well! _

**Izzy:** _???? _

**Jace:** _ I’ll explain everything to you. Short story is: our brother had too much to drink  _ **😂😂😂😂😂**

**Izzy: 😂😂😂😂😂**

**Alec:** _ Hey, this is no way to speak to your CEO, children! _

 

Alec spent a few more minutes messing around on the texts, but then his stomach made a weird flip and he needed to call it a day, telling all of his minions that the meeting would be happening soon. So, in the end, it was just him and Underhill again at the bar, but Alec wanted to go home. 

 

“Magnus! Call Magnus, Theo, I need by hubby,” whined Alec.

 

“Yes, yes,” said Underhill and snorted, helping Alec on his legs and took him outside, so that he could get some fresh air as he looked very pale. In the time that Alec was catching his breath, Underhill called Magnus, who portalled over to them in a matter of a few seconds and Alec happily cheered. 

 

“There you are, my little CEO,” said Magnus and helped Alec onto his legs.

 

Alec mused. “Nothing on me is little, Magnus,” said Alec and waggled his eyebrows. 

 

“Thank you for watching over him,” said Magnus, Underhill giving him thumbs up as Alec was off in his own lala land, singing and humming happily, making up a tune for a commercial of their brand. “I’ll take it from here,” said Magnus then and Underhill nodded.

 

“Okay. See you tomorrow then,” said Underhill and Magnus nodded.

 

“See ya. Say hi to Marcel from me,” he then said and after they said their goodbyes, Magnus portalled Alec and himself back to their loft. 

 

“Oh, when did we get home?” asked Alec with a giggle. “Poof and here we are,” he said, giggling as he was amusing himself. 

 

“Yes, yes… poof,” said Magnus and kissed Alec happily. Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus and as he lost his balance they ended up falling on the floor, Alec landing on top of Magnus and he waggled his eyebrows.

 

“Poof and you’re under me,” said Alec. “Maybe I have some magic in me too,” he said with a wink.

 

“Oh there’s no doubt in that,” said Magnus and chuckled. “C’mere,” he said and pulled Alec down for another kiss. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank u for reading ^^  
> Leave a comment if u liked it 💗


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